Saturday, 28 November 2015

#AWA

I am naturally an emotional person and when it comes to the state of health of people I am over emotional and concerned. One day this past week as I walked by Ojuelegba on my way home I heard an ambulance blaring its siren and right there was this stubborn driver who parked stoically on the road blocking off the ambulance from making a detour into the adjoining road. I stood and all my senses nudged me to throw a stone at the guy but before I could do such another well meaning Nigerian sprung into action and no he didn't hurl stones at him, only walked up to the driver and told him to make way. I was really really excited to see a concerned Nigerian doing the right thing. God bless that man who stood up to save another - that could have been precious minutes to whoever was being transported for emergency treatment.  
This ties nicely into something that has been strongly on my mind and therefore brings me to today's post #AWA - Age Without Achievement. 
In your own words, what is achievement? To me achievement is simply a great deed to a fellow man and in my dictionary it is synonymous with impact.

A gazillion lot has been said about making impact; using your God-given talent(s) or picked-up skill(s) to positively brighten the lives of others. What is impact exactly? Let's start by creating a little understanding of this English word...

For the purpose of this post, focus will be on above definition but without the 'research' - simply put impact contributing strongly to someone or something(society)/having a strong effect/influence on someone or something. Now to the question: what influence do you have on anyone? How is your lifestyle patterned and skills exploited to create influence?

Truly there is hardly any man in fact no man on the face of this earth without a talent regardless of what his beliefs are - it is just as everyone is being blessed with the gift of sunshine. 
God has given us ideas and wisdom that no mortal man can gainsay so what's stopping you from performing some miracle with it? I haven't asked you to become the President or Bishop head nor have I said you should become the owner of 20 businesses right now but in your own capacity do the bit you can to make another life better, enjoyable and fulfilled. All of the degrees bagged should be channeled to creating businesses and enabling environment for others to thrive. I have read diverse and countless stories of people doing big things around the world that I personally ask myself what my achievement has been. My degrees? My posts? My father's house?  The way I see it the greatest achievement one will have will come through ones gifts and passion definitively. I currently do not own any business that employs other people. I currently do not support any specific initiative that support the development of others but randomly in one little way or the other I contribute to worthy causes. Hopefully someday I'll start my own shelter for the nimble but in the meantime this is how I am influencing my small circle of influence. 

So tell me @ sixteen; @ twenty; @ thirty; what are you thinking? 

Owning a 1001 closets filled with trendy shoes and bags? Don't get me wrong I am a fashionista myself.

Touring the entire continents on the planet?

Working tirelessly to reach top position for the sole purpose of earning megabucks?

Knowing all the ladies/guys intimately such that you know how Miss/Mr B smells?

All these remain right and on point except for the last point obviously *thumbs up* but what is life with mere material things? I repeat,I haven't asked you to become the President or Bishop head nor have I said you should become the owner of 20 businesses right now but in your own capacity do the bit you can to make another life better, enjoyable and fulfilled.

The oldest man mentioned in the Bible is Methusela. What was his achievement? Don't fall into that category. Never age without impacting your world. Say no to #AWA and choose to age with achievement ;-) that's still #AWA right? Define your world and in this case your words...






Monday, 26 October 2015

2 in 1

That's how Toinlicious gave me ginger to write and post something over the weekend but mehn somehow in between house chores and work spillover I got stumped - I'll get to the assigned 'task' in a bit but first of all...

THE 1 IN THE 2
FOR DASH :-)
My colleagues sometimes laugh at me when this particular woman comes in to sell shoes to the ladies and they see me show face. They think I have too many shoes already...well I dunno if that's true because as is I need sandals and more shoes of course *shines teeth* One day I chose to do a shoe count and saw some pairs of shoes still there unworn (oh so you thought I was gonna divulge how many pairs I got...no way) The realization that I have a couple currently not being worn put me in a very generous mood.


Any interested blog reader? Please indicate in comment box ;-) The black is a 40 while the orange is a 39. I actually thought the orange would fit since it's a sandal but nah e nor gree. It's a tad too small for me so I haven't worn either. I give the first persons to show interest and please pick up is on you(one shoe per individual. No double anointing here biko). 


THE 2 IN THE 2



RULES
1.                  Thank the blogger who nominated you, linking back to their site
2.                  Put the award logo on your blog
3.                  Answer the ten questions sent to you
4.                  Nominate five blogs
5.                  Make up ten new questions for your nominees to answer. 

That's what I got nominated for by madame Toinlicious and my simple task is to answer the below questions after which I do the honors of nominating 5 other ladies to continue the tradition. Here goes...

1. What is your biggest pet peeve? MY BIGGEST PET PEEVE WOULD BE EMOTIONAL MANIPULATION. I hate it with a passion and the manipulators themselves!

3. Make a confession about anything. Ah! The only thing that comes to mind will cause me to receive tongue lashing *tongue out*

4. What is the lesson of love that took you the longest to learn? NOT EVERYONE IS AS OPEN-MINDED AS I AM SO I HAVE LEARNED TO HIDE INFORMATION *straight face*

5. If you could spend one day alone with anyone in history (dead or alive), whom would you choose? OLUWAMAYOKUN CHRISTIE SEYE-OLOWOYO 

6. If you had to teach your kids one lesson in life, what would it be? YOU MAY NOT BE AS BRILLIANT AS THE NEXT GUY/GIRL BUT YOU ARE DEFINITELY BETTER THAN HIM/HER AT SOMETHING. EXPLORE YOUR UNIQUE BRILLIANCE!

7. If you could "un-know" one thing, what would it be? THE KNOWLEDGE OF HELL

8. Paint your entire home inside and out a single colour other than white, what colour would you choose? ALL SHADES OF GREEN
9. What is the most terrifying moment of your life? WHEN CHRISTIE PASSED. WHEN I NEEDED TO WRITE AN EULOGY, IN THE DARK AND ALONE. WHEN I NEEDED TO WATCH HER BODY BEING LOWERED TO THE GROUND. 

10. If you could transport yourself to a place/era in d world, where would you go? THE BAHAMAS

Who do I nominate now? All the blogs I follow have been nominated jo :-(


The interior guru Nkem




YOUR QUESTIONS
1. What was your favorite bedtime story growing up?(If you didn't have one don't be shy...skip)
2. You ever had a crush? Who was/is your crush?
3. Recreate one fun moment from your secondary school days
4. Imagine you get N15,000,000 in one month what would you do with the free money?
5. Your guiding principle?
6. If you had a chance to ask for one favor from either of your parent right now what would it be?
7. Assuming I am a Marketing Manager in charge of all brands globally :-) which of my brands would you love to model for and why?
8. What is that one song that causes you to pause to dance every time in comes on radio or TV?
9. Which do you prefer to be seen in at all times - native, formal wears or semi-formal?
10. Who's the last person you talk to before going to sleep?

Saturday, 10 October 2015

Her story...what's yours?

I got married in 2012 and had been trusting God for the fruit of the womb. Then my menstrual periods became irregular. Sometimes, it will show up once in 6 months. I was advised to run fertility tests by my gynecologist and to my amazement, the results were terrible. I was diagnosed of blocked Fallopian tube, PCOS (ovarian cysts) and annovulation ( meaning I was not ovulating). I was so depressed and I wondered how on earth I would conceive without menstruating not to talk of ovulating. So we commenced treatment and I had to use many drugs, we spent so much yet there were no changes, in fact the monthly periods stopped totally. We moved from hospital to hospital and from pillar to post.

One fateful day in church(Daystar Christian Centre) I came across an invite to baby showers by Joyful mothers and fathers forum.My attendance at the program marked a turning point in my life. I discovered that the forum was for couples that were trusting God for the fruit of the womb and couples that were already pregnant who were trusting God for safe carriage and delivery. That day was awesome. I heard so many testimonies and I realized I wasn't alone. I learnt meetings were held every Saturday so I made up my mind to start attending.
The very 1st Saturday I attended, I was presented a book titled God's waiting room written by Yewande Zaccheus. Then a spirit filled teacher revealed so many scriptures to us concerning what God had said about conception and I was extremely blessed that day. That book took my breath away, I devoured it in a day as soon as I read the first page. The teachings at the meetings every week and that book multiplied my faith. I went to the bookshop and realized the book even had other parts so I bought more copies and sowed them into the lives of other waiting couples.
 

My husband and I kept on attending JMJF forum in church and usually got inspired through the uncountable testimonies that were shared and the teachings and our faith was strengthened by them all. At the end of that year,we still had not conceived and my younger sister had her baby. Pressure started mounting from all sides but I won't stop thanking God for the encouragements he brought our way and for not letting us fall into depression. Our thinking had changed and our faith had been renewed. So many scriptures kept me going when I felt low especially Gen 1:28 and Ps 128:3. I and my hubby used to feel bad before whenever we heard someone had conceived or had a baby and we would avoid the naming ceremonies so that I would not start crying as usual. I can't begin to say all the trauma, insults and embarrassments I experienced from various people just because I wasn't yet pregnant. In 2014,We kept on attending JMJF, observed the fasts, and in faith, we obeyed the instructions to buy our baby things, we put our baby's bed permanently on our bed and I remember friends used to giggle at the sight of our empty baby's bed when they had the chance to enter our room. They wondered what had come over us.We prepared a list of our baby's name and put it on the bed,someone once gave us money for our kids so we put the money in the bed too.
We had a prayer meeting at the forum and an instruction was given to us all that we should not doubt God by trying to help God and that we should put our total trust in him. So we keyed in and started declaring that we want all the glory to be to God when our prayers get answered. We didn't want any doctor or drug to share God's glory. Why would we have to pay for what God gives free of charge?
 

2014 was our year of enlargement and we had many testimonies of people conceiving and having their children at the forum. We intensified our faith and joined service units in church because we knew that if we worked for God, he would reward us. We read our pregnancy confessions every morning before leaving the house and we wore customized shirts with our baby's names. In my service unit, we use code names rather than real names and I chose fruity as my name so that I will be called by what God called me. God had called me fruitful and not barren. So people called me fruity though they didn't know why and I used to say "Amen" on the inside.
 

On bbm, I changed my name to a long list of my baby names and people wondered why.Our mindset had changed. We attended many baby naming ceremonies and rejoiced with all we heard had babies and gave them gifts. As it is written in God's word that we should give thanks in all things, we started thanking God over our situation and stopped complaining and we rejoiced with those rejoicing. We refused to focus on what we didn't have but on all what God had given us. We started attending service at the church annex where couples with babies sat even though we did not have any physical baby. I used to take communion twice there, one for me and for my baby in faith.
 

Over time, people said all sorts, some advised us to go to prayer warrior churches because they felt our church prayers were not spiritual enough. Some gave us addresses of some so-called excellent hospitals, some people even suggested spiritualists and traditional midwives. Others advised different types of herbs but we stood on God's word that promised us conception and the fact that we would not help God.
 

When it was Dec 31st, I was a bit discouraged that my prayer did not look like it had been answered because I had made a pledge to God which I promised to redeem if I could conceive in 2014. But then, I still glorified God and danced like never before at the watch-night service because I still had my life. Meanwhile, the last time I went for a pregnancy test was in April 2014 and it came out negative. When we got home that day, I took my biro, cancelled the negative result and wrote positive. I remember my husband smiled and said Amen o and he prayed that the next test I would do would be positive so he stapled that result to the wall in our room. I made up my mind not to go to the hospital again till it will be time for antenatal in faith so I substituted hospital visitations with JMJF meetings and substituted drugs with holy communion. Pastor Kenny declared in church one day that the money we were supposed to spend in the hospital will be used to buy clothes and to enjoy ourselves and I keyed in. I drained my account and went to shop for more baby things, then I went to family first bookshop in church and bought many pregnancy books based on healing by faith.I kept on sowing, I gave out more copies of God's waiting room book and September baby shower JMJF DVDs.
 

In 2015, our year of promotion, on the 24th of January, on our way to JMJF meeting, I had to attend to some issues so my husband got there before me. On my way back, I called him to find out which class he was in and he said he was in expectant class( for those yet to get pregnant) and I replied him that we were pregnant already in faith and pleaded with him to move to pregnancy class. The meeting had ended by the time I got there so I just knelt in the pregnancy class and prayed to God to put me there in this year 2015.
On the 26th of January which was a Monday, I felt so sick and my hubby suggested anti malaria drugs but I just insisted on paracetamol . When there were no changes he dragged me to the hospital and everything happened in a flash, I was confirmed pregnant in the same hospital that had told me it would not be possible if I did not undergo treatment. Me that I had no menses,I did a scan and did another test to confirm and all came back positive. Joy overflowed in our hearts and tears of joy filled my eyes. At last! God had answered our prayers. My husband then took that result and placed it beside the one that had been on the wall in 2014 and we realized that it was exactly the same 26th, 9 months ago that I cancelled that negative result with my pen.


Truly, God is awesome because the scan revealed that I conceived in 2014 so God answered my prayers afterall in our year of enlargement and I went to redeem my pledge. My pregnancy journey was wonderful and God blessed me with extra ordinary strength. I didn't experience most of the negative predictions by experienced mothers, infact I was glowing. God was faithful till the end and he blessed us with a bouncing baby boy in September 2015. God truly makes everything beautiful in his time because in this same 2015, he bIessed us all round and opened greater doors to us miraculously.


I thank God for giving me a very wonderful and supportive husband who never made life miserable for me because I couldn't conceive on time. I thank Pastor Sam and Nike Adeyemi of Daystar Christian Centre for helping me to know that I could communicate with God directly without having to consult any medium. I thank the teachers in Joyful Mothers and Fathers forum at Daystar for opening my eyes to the power of faith.I also thank those who prayed with us and called us fruitful in our service unit(Starguard) in church. God bless my home fellowship members for their endless prayers. I thank Pastor Moses Oyerinde of EFCC church, Ago-Iwoye for his encouragement, support and prayers from school days till now. He even honored me by presiding over the naming of our son. I thank my beautiful mother and my sisters for their unending support. God bless my friends, my colleagues at Grand Oak Ltd and all those I can't mention who stood by me. God bless Mrs Yewande Zaccheus for writing that book.


My brothers and sisters, with God, nothing shall be impossible! Don't compare yourself with others, we all have our individual races to run. At the end, only God will do what only he can do. He is the one that can do all things. He makes a way where there seems to be no way and he honors our faith.
Part of the pledge I made to God if he answered my prayer was to proclaim his goodness far and wide and to testify to his faithfulness which is what I am doing. Please don't hesitate to help me spread this message to encourage a soul. There is a beautiful future for all those who put their total trust in God. Don't let that negative report depress you. It is what God says that is final not what that negative situation says. God still answers prayers so don't give up. Just believe!


I and my husband did a lot of fasting and praying and God did not let all be in vain. We even prayed for our son all the time when we had not yet conceived. What would we have done if nothing happened after everything? Many people have been trusting God for one thing or the other for decades and they are still waiting. God will have compassion on who he will have compassion on. It has not been by our power or might. Please praise the Lord on our behalf for his faithfulness. I pray that whatever it is you are trusting God for will be given unto you. God will honor your faith and you will not wait in vain. You will have a reason to testify in Jesus name. 


Please join me in praising the Lord of Hosts! The God that changed my name, the Father that took away my reproach, the one that disgraced my negative medical report by giving me a wonderful son without any man's intervention, Awimayehun, Alagbada ina, Asoromatase, the King of kings, Lion of Judah, Rose of Sharon, Balm in Gilead. Oba awon Oba, Oyigiyigi Glory! Halleluyah.


Your testimony is next in Jesus name.

Friday, 9 October 2015

WHY WAS THIS JUST A NOTE?


Right now there are about four different stories practically dancing around in my head. Exciting scenes. Witty dialogue. Role plays. None has found verbal or written expression - sadly. Maybe it is time to make the sought of computers that will extract information/ideas from one's thoughts and act as transcriber...

Where is my muse?

While I await the miraculous appearance of my muse there's this spoken word poetry I performed last year and it beats me why I never put it up as a post and left it only as a note on Facebook! It is my work, my thoughts so why not? Enjoy and of course beyond pleasurable reading, let the central message sink deep.


Life’s journey took me through west,


At age 15 when I first met Jessie

Damn right dirty, this girl was the best

A decade older Jessie got me living on the edge

2-4-7 we pleasured on the bed

Getting stoned on dope and sipping brew

Grass and coke, all on the menu



Ahead of my game I was really living large

Halima, Fatima, Cynthia, Sunita

Long legged, small waist, full bossom were my fondest

All around campus I was tagged the hottest

That was my name…

I lived for the fame

And everything that came with it;

Hot chicks, cool digs

All around town I was rolling

Pleasure was all I lived for

Earthly treasure was all I worked for



Tito…the household name in every bar

The name on the lips of all the women in the spa

Tito…the leader of the gang, dreaded master at shooting down targets

& the go-to guy for everything shady



Then the years fly by and they didn’t do me any justice

20 years on, my features are losing shape

I got doctors round the clock trying to save my face

20 years on I’m more bones than flesh, no strength in my chest

My liver is failing; the dust is calling out to me

All through my hay days, I sought solace & perfection in funny living;

took to parties, whoring and gambling; all of which morphed into pain



But…

While lurking in my bad habits I found something

Something…something worth nothing

It was more demanding than amusing

I found something more close but not perfect

Something so unambiguous

That in my pleasurable lifestyle, I had no content, no joy, no rest of mind



Even I a master had failed at his game

Nothing is certain in life. It is true.

But...who never fails or strays at his game?

Who never changes and remains the same?

My head is clouded…my eyes shrouded…

A name rings, starting to form

Who’s the best, in top form ahead of his game never to stumble?

A know all? A do all?

A conqueror, an unchangeable being? A victor, A warrior? 

Who is?

Who is the upholder of all things?

The everlasting, the rock, the true light, the builder, the foundation, the e-eend?

Who is?



JC? But that’s the Lord Jesus Christ



Yet in all my excitement and this feeling of newness

A voice shrills at me

Horrid thoughts rolling through my mind

Once a whore, always a whore

Once a gambler, always a gambler

Once a thief, always a thief

Once a lesbian, always a lesbian

Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic

Once a sinner, always a sinner

I’m lost and helpless to a fault

Whose voice shall I belief

But…

But…who then can condemn me?

For judgement is of the Lord’s

Who is saying unto me…

“All things are of God who hath reconciled us to Himself through Christ Jesus, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation”

He is saying unto me…

"Let the wicked forsake his ways and the unrighteous man his thoughts, Let him return to the Lord and he will have mercy on him and to our God for he will abundantly pardon".



That’s our God of love; his sweet fragrance spreading out

He’s calling you too…come home sister, come home brother to the feet of Christ Jesus. He is called the "Unbeatable Best"



Part of this piece was first written by ME in my jotter in 2008/2009 when I performed other poetry in the university under this same theme - "Unbeatable Best". If anyone from CASOR (Christ Ambassadors Student Outreach) Ago Iwoye branch or beyond has a video of me doing any of my recitals, I'll be happy to lay my hands on those again. All the other poems written and performed have somehow faded with the years *whew*


Caught in the art!
Image credit -Ms Baderinwa & Deviant art

Tuesday, 15 September 2015

5 things I would support if I didn't believe in God




Welcome to http://www.mindplosive.com/ (anyone noticed the changes? Oh yes we own this baby *winks*) and in other news, I officially sign off with Honiilols now so I can make all the crazeeeeeeeeey comments on ya blogs ;-) without being caught especially at odd hours.

Blogsville is truly a very big community brimming with intelligent and uber smart folks. Some days I take time to blog whore and one of those days I stumbled on this beautiful post by Adaeze. The title alone snagged my attention and after reading I thought to come up with my own list of "5 things"

It's no secret that I am a Christian not because I was born into a home filled with believers but it is a state of well-being that I chose. My journey learning the teachings of Christ has been amazing and living those teachings have been even more fun as I grow older. As much as my faith, values and beliefs are firmly rooted and guided in that truth of the supremacy of Christ Jesus, certain dark thoughts play around in my head - even though they never find expressions. If we as human beings were mind readers, a 1001 of us would walk the roads with mouths agape. What are my thoughts? If I didn't believe in God and isn't the believer that I am today I would STAUNCHLY support:


SUICIDE
Yes I will.
I however need to draw a line between killing strictly oneself and dragging an entire community/household on a stupid wicked suicidal journey. The suicide in context is killing oneself. I come from a tribe where the belief is "Iku ya ju esin lo" (death is better/quicker/safer than shame).

If a man is in great financial distress or some sort of big mess(whoever could have been responsible is an asides) and feels the only way to end the inevitable shame is to die; by all means let him kill himself. There's no point being a walking zombie and becoming entirely useless to self, society and all if there is no strength to deal with such shame.

I would have said allow him - whatever method works but as long as the death claims only that life.

ABORTION
This is a bit sensitive because even as a believer I have tendencies to want to push for abortion in certain circumstances. I recently saw a movie where a a newly married lady got raped as a virgin before her husband and sadly fertilization occurred afterwards. All the while I kept asking why a doctor was not consulted immediately the deed happened to provide some help flushing out the sperm. I remember Duru of YNCB asking me some months ago to read a post and share my thoughts on the decision made by the FG to deny the boko haram rape victims abortion. I mean after suffering such cruelty those girls are still expected to carry bitterness in their wombs for 9 months and populate the society with more evil! Can there be that freedom here to decide between carrying the pregnancy to full term or going the other route?


BEING A MORALIST
A moralist is simply a person who has strong opinions about what is right and acceptable. Of course these people don't necessarily have to be Christians; they just have a sense of what is right from a legal point of view and they advocate for due punishment when another errs.

If I didn't believe in the message of grace I would support the cause of moralists - that every man does what is right at ALL times and when he slips, he should be punished for it immediately according to the binding laws but for Luke 6:35-38 and John 8:7-11
"But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil. Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful. Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven: Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again".

"They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust.When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman.Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman,“Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”


DISOBEYING PARENTS AND AUTHORITY
This is a clearly stated Bible commandment but honestly if I wasn't a Christian I would openly flaunt unreasonable rules, disobey authorities and folks who push certain things on me beyond my capacity but with wisdom and in love still, such matters should be handled.

EUTHANASIA
This is the act or practice of killing/permitting the death of hopelessly sick or injured individuals in a relatively painless way for reasons of mercy. Like Adaeze I would also have been all for this. I hate suffering of any kind - physical, emotional,mental. Any suffering. Some people have had to pray fervently for the death of loved ones because they couldn't help their situation and couldn't watch them suffer either. If in their hearts they can silently wish why not just do the act? Pull the plug? Ease their discomfort? 

Thank God for the life I now live. No doubt, there are some things I still struggle to understand but each day presents new learning and I am happy to model my life after Christ. There is my list of 5 things...now you can release your breath :-) 




Image credit - Daniel Miessler







Sunday, 30 August 2015

10 Myths About Introverts

I found this  article by Carl King quite interesting (I'm sure you understand why). 

 


Myth 1 : Introverts don’t like to talk 
This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.

Myth 2 : Introverts are shy
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite.
 
Myth 3 : Introverts are rude
Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.

Myth 4 : Introverts don’t like people
On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.

Myth 5 : Introverts don’t like to go out in public
Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” They’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.

Myth 6 : Introverts always want to be alone
Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.

Myth 7 : Introverts are weird
Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.

Myth 8 : Introverts are aloof nerds
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.
 
Myth 9 : Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun
Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.

Myth 10 : Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts
A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. (Yes, I reversed these two terms on purpose to show you how biased our society is.) Introverts cannot “fix themselves” and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.



The summarized myths resonated with me that it spurred me to reblog content. I have been considered ALL of the above and more but hey how do you reckon the world would be without me or folks like me? Embrace diversity; it's beautiful!

Wednesday, 26 August 2015

15-for-15-Challenge05 - The bug bit me too

Image source - www.animationlibrary.com




Nah not that kind of 'yamayama' insect bug that causes some itchy uncomfortable feeling. It's another kind of bug; a very beautiful bug that leaves one feeling passionate about a thing, happy about that same thing and super proud of the results that emanate although I am fully aware also that interests can be fleeting but who knows, this one may just last!


So what is it? I've been badly bitten by the natural hair blog. Did someone just make a victory sound? For the longest time ever I have wanted to cut my hair - blame it on all the years spent in primary and secondary school 'cornrowless' devoid of girly curls like many pretty girls had. I enjoyed those days of hair-liberty when I could freely pour a bucket full of water on my sparse hair. That carefree attitude one had dunking in and out of a big river or reservoir of water. *Arrrrrrrrrgh* It was sheer bliss to feel the touch of the tiny blue tail comb against my scalp unlike the sharp edged 'ilarun' you would have to endure sitting between the legs of Mrs Adanma or Mama Suliya just because you needed to make 'patewo' as called on the assembly ground by the Head Teacher. Believe me it was great joy knowing my weekends would be spent reading Mills & Boon or any other captivating stuff and not have to wait on a very long annoying queue while the other girls got their hair styled. Low cut meant punk for me in those days or simply skin pronounced /skeeeen/. I wish I could whip up one of my oldies so you'll have a look-see at the kinda girl-boy I was. Fast forward undergraduate days it didn't come as a shock to me when the thoughts burst forth from the recess of my mind to go on that journey again and this time it was to be a deliberate and intentional decision not because the school forced me to go on low cut but alas my folks wouldn't let me. They believed it should be my husband giving me permission to be weird. I say 'weird' because at the time the bug hadn't caught on deeply so a lady at my age would have looked off on such low in the midst of people but January 1 2015, I became my husband...

I cut my hair!

Experiences have shown that I can be very impulsive but that decision was definitely unexpected as at 31st December 2014. So yes I am on that train now #teamnatural #naturalista and I'm trying to learn all I can about feeding my hair but mehn all the daily AM and PM and weekly and monthly routine are quite religious o. This time going on skin didn't come up as an option - you know why. My hair journey started with Anita Baker cut which I still permed and styled as I liked then the relaxer addition ceased at some point and I turned to texturizer application but that also took a deep plunge with more knowledge gathered. I'm not about to turn this to a hair blog as I'm not sure I even want to chronicle every inch growth but maybe once in a while I may just show off some new tricks I pick up from hair-blog whoring. I have subscribed to a couple of bbm channels but I absolutely love Natural Hair Product Review managed by Ellen who blogs at kinky Nigerian curls

To keep my hair healthy I have done & will continue to do the honey +  egg yolk mixture as I have also developed a hair regimen as well as wash routine.It's pretty simple.

Mornings I moisturize with water and apply Castor oil (I'm sticking to one now so I know what works best for my hair).

Evenings I do the same and seal the moisture and oil in my hair by using a satin scarf.

Twice a week - Wednesdays and Sundays are my wash days when I use the honey mixture which I apply first before washing with shampoo or ordinary conditioner. Then I use deep conditioner, wait a couple of minutes -----> rinse -------> apply leave-in conditioner ------> There are various terms used but you can always read up to get familiar.

So here goes my picture roll...in no particular order

01/01/15 Boyish huh? ;-)



Look @ me not 'em & definitely not the waste basket *covers face*


May '15

A bit of tuxturizer here

rocking my Anita Baker


Straw curls thingz ;-)



As life isn't a bed of roses I expect this journey to be bumpy. It's gulping a bit of dosh already. When the hair throws some tantrums let's see how determined and prepared I am for the haul.

Are you a #naturalista too? What care tips do you wanna share? That's obviously directed to the lady sir :)

Typed. Edited(I think). Delivered. My fifth piece in the 15-for-15 Challenge themed woman; her body, soul and spirit




PS - 'ilarun' is a type of local comb, usually brownish with very pointed tips used to part/cut hair into sections by hair stylists.

'patewo'  is a local hairstyle too which literally means 'clap' your hands'. It was such a popular hair style for girls in secondary school those days in this part of town.



Tuesday, 11 August 2015

True Yarns

Hello beautiful blogger fam,

How y'all doing this grand Tuesday? So I've been on leave for over a week now but been unable to write a thing still :-( Guess it's time to make a public call for guest post...please feel free to email me (oyinlohlarsobowale@yahoo.com) your creative writing and let's get this blog on a roller coaster mode 24/7. You git? 

Okay back to biznez. Today I'll be sharing some personal lessons and thoughts I picked up from random books I've read over the years. Hope you find a word or two to guide you through life. Cheers amigos and amigas! E-hugs













So which quote was your favorite? Any you would love to share with other readers? Let's hear you...drop a line ;-)

Monday, 20 July 2015

LIKE FATHER LIKE SON!


 So I stood...observing; taking in every fine detail. I watched as every male and female made way into the already packed cream-colored duplex. In 2s and 3s, folks arrived. The men sure looked regal dressed in the now trending danshiki - some of them anyways. Most still had on the 'traditional' get-together outfit - casual jeans and shirts with folded sleeves as if folding the sleeves would give the starched shirts which would have looked impressive in a formal setting an approval and the ladies? Leggings and bum shorts ruled the evening.


Still I watched from my perfect vantage spot at the balcony facing the main gate to the house with my gaze reaching as far as the estate entrance itself. Many came empty-handed, a few (home trained you may be tempted to say) came bearing gift. Like I wasn't part of the former group *rolls eyes* You see like everyone else present at *212 Tianiyu Crescent on 19/07/15 asides one, I was a guest - guest of a guest in fact! It was a happy gathering. Birthdays should be solemn but life should also be celebrated and that was the reason for our turn up. We were together to eat and drink what had been prepared/provided by the happy celebrant whose name eludes me at the moment.

Not one with a free disposition towards new people, I chose to observe. Spying colour blends, sexy guys girls I mean and no guy(s) are my preferred but I love looking at girls *winks* I tapped my feet even as my eyes roamed; bouncing off faces. I moved my head and wriggled my waist slightly as Phyno's abasha blared through the speakers. Next thing I knew some guy came to stand beside me, lit a stick and smoked on  and like sugar attracting ant, announcing all it's 'honeyness' to the world his friends drew closer. All cigarette in hand breathing in and breathing out, blowing thick smoke. No surprise there for where there is ice cold beer + plenty shots of whiskey there shall you find----------------- I borrowed myself brain sharp sharp relinquishing my spot to them boys but my roving eyes never gave up its scenery observation & admiration.

In came another group; younger guys with a very cute terrier in trail. The wiry little rascal got everyone 'oohing' and 'aahing' in seconds at its overdose cuteness plus the dog knew commands too! The owner (from his apparent connection and signals) soon brought out a black metal case from his pocket which appeared like a protector of some sort. He had his rolling paper all set, some finely blended substance I could see from where I was and the process began - substance in rolling paper, his spit was the gum-mer...in the mouth it went and the circle of attraction repeated again. A few more guys rolled joint and smoked like they owned the spot. Of course that wasn't the highpoint, the boss (metal case owner himself) took a deep drag and next thing I saw him with his terrier; his hands pushed into his furs, his mouth on his and he breathed the joint-ladened-breath into this cute terrier. That dog became hyperactive and that's no exaggeration! A quick search for what to eat , you should have just seen it prancing.

I smiled. All that came to my mind was LIKE FATHER LIKE SON PET. "Baba amugbo, Omo amugbo" (Father a smoker, son a smoker).





Writer's note - Event was real but address was fictitious
Picture credit - www.pinterest.com



Wednesday, 1 July 2015

15-for-15 Challenge04 - You are who Google says you are!

Ever heard of that saying before or you don't believe it?

I recently attended a breakfast meeting where Clara Chinwe Okoro, the curator for CoolBrands in Nigeria hammered that exact thought and she also shared some powerful insights on 'personal brand building'.

Welcome to my fourth piece in the 15-for-15 Challenge themed woman; her body, soul and spirit. I am going to expand the sphere of my target audience however to include the menfolk (though I'm sure they've found the previous posts in this series interesting too *winks*) The aim is write a post that will improve a person's spiritual, physical and mental acuity.

Permit me to share a story with you. A few months into my MBA programme some industry experts came to give us one of those out-of-this-world pep talk that was to serve as an eye-opener into the real corporate world. The guest speaker went on about managing our individual reputation online, highlighting how a good online reputation affects people's perception of us and how impressions are formed based on that virtual contact. At the time LinkedIn was the major tool being marketed to us but beyond that platform other social networking tools were discussed. The presentation left me with a single thought, "what will people find about me when they google my name". This I am sure was the overarching objective on the part of the consultant, he aimed to provoke our senses to ask ourselves that all-important question and hey I did. I got on my laptop, googled my name and alas! I wasn't even found on the first page.

RULE NO 1.

Whatever you do ensure you remain visible on the FIRST PAGE!









For real, one does not simply go to page 2 to continue a search except such a person is involved in a detailed research work. That day I searched for my name I was completely unimpressed by the results that jumped out at me. I was not on the first page neither did my name reveal much on the other page which brings me to this other rule (I'll get to that in a bit). These days people, not restricted to employers of skills check you out first online before an actual meeting! Ask an HR expert he/she will tell you the same.


RULE NO 2.

Write your own story and I don't mean that figuratively.

Trust me when I say content is king. One of the searches I found of myself revealed I had a blogger account which was something that was created when I needed to comment on some interesting post I had earlier read but beyond that there was no activity whatsoever on that account. Empty blogspot account for someone who loves to write??? "Tufiakwa" (God-forbid) "kamari" (may it never happen). You know this is a case of the tailor's son wearing rags?

Trust yours truly, that was the propeller for me to start this blog. A new journey was defined and I chose to activate that account which had been dormant for over six months. The first post was put up in January 2014 and I haven't stopped since - well except when I need to take the occasional breaks due to one reason or the other ;-)

Here's the juicy/dicey part. When you google me what do you find? (Hold on before you rush off to take that test *tongue out* let's look at a sub-rule)

RULE NO 2.1.

- Your passion

- Your achievement

- Your vision

People must find these 3 things or a combination of them in any dimension. For instance searches of my name will reveal 75% of my passion and 25% split between the others (no one's assigning weights nor rating).

We agree we need to have an active reputation online. What sort of reputation do we want to build? A good one. How can that be created? Simple.

First you must define your personal brand. Who are you? What do you want associated with you? What's your niche? What angers you to a point of compassion? What are your values? Beliefs? The onus rests on YOU to define that. A lot of young fellows are doing great on the internet space these days; some as relationship catalysts, some as fitness experts. Consultants of all sorts making things happen. But hey, don't be sad the space isn't saturated yet. There is always room for you to exploit just define your personal brand.

Create content to support your personal brand. You remember those 3 things - passion, vision, accomplishment? Create a story around them. Like I earlier said the job can be done for you by a close friend, an acquaintance or a relation. I mean I know a young guy who is a relationship catalyst. This guy is super active on social media. He comes up with different poster designs every other week to push his twitter activities through BBM plus Whatsapp broadcasts and guess what? Someone does the designing for him. He only does the talking!

(That's no advert by the way). Point is you don't necessarily have to know how to articulate your vision/passion/achievement but allow the help of others and push this story on your LinkedIn profile - you should create one between. If you are still as young as I am and you intend to remain in the corporate world for a while even if you are a budding entrepreneur you need visibility online! I have a senior friend who jokingly told me I shouldn't date too many guys so that when he becomes president and asks me to join his cabinet no guy will come with some blackmailing stunt threatening to reveal all the eeeeevil I 'may' have done as a single young lady. This applies to the digital space as well, when your children come of age and read about you online, what will they find? The time to manage what is being seen or read about you is now because whatever people find about you defines who or what they think you are whether you like it or not.

Use Google as your wingman. Yeah you read that right. Make sure this content is found on Google. Link your pages, let there be easy access to you (not necessarily your privacy) but your identity. My Facebook page is linked to my blog and blog is linked to Instagram...just like that. You may not be able to afford paying for SEO services but if you own a business you may want to consider this (I'll let the experts tutor you on this one - calling on Peace Itimi).

So ladies and gent, that's my bit this week to you. Create an image that will positively impart your online reputation because...